Kids Are Supposed to Be Young; What’s Wrong With That?
Reading textbooks on developmental psychology reveals a truly poignant spectacle. Scholars have constructed all sorts of grandiose theories just to prevent adults from dismissing and browbeating children as "deficient beings." They claim that children and adults possess qualitatively different, magnificent universes, or that they operate under different paradigms for viewing the world. In essence, they threw up a massive shield called "qualitative difference" to protect the child.
Yet, as you quietly peer behind those flashy theoretical rhetorics, a sudden wave of discomfort surges from deep within. Why must we go as far as issuing a complex certificate—labeling them "beings in a special stage qualitatively different from us"—just to respect children?
Let us state the facts. Children are deficient adults. They are immature physically, cognitively, and emotionally. They are under-developed, naive, and miles away from meeting an adult’s yardstick. But so what? Isn’t it only natural for kids to be young?
A Society Where Lacking Becomes a License to Dismiss
The real issue is not the fact that children are immature, but rather the arrogant attitude of adults who believe that "if someone is lacking, they can be ignored." Since when did deficiency become a ground for contempt in the human world? Who on earth granted a free pass to treat someone carelessly simply because they are weaker, know less, or are less developed than we are?
The very fact that scholars defensively built a shield, apologizing that "children aren’t deficient, they are just different from us," might unwittingly concede to the cruel premise that "deficient beings have no choice but to be ignored."
However, a truly noble gaze toward humanity does not rely on such pathetic excuses. Whether a child is lacking or not, no one in this world has the right to dismiss another person simply because they are immature. We just need to understand and embrace a human being exactly as they are, including their deficiencies—accepting youth for being youth, and immaturity for being immaturity.
Are All Adults Mature, Then?
Taking this a step further, we can fling a scathing question at the scholars’ stepped stages of development: "Are all adults mature, then?"
The world is overflowing with adults who, despite being over eighty, act far more selfishly and immaturely than a thirty-year-old youth—or even a three-year-old toddler. Conversely, there are children who, despite their tender age, possess a depth and maturity that command respect from adults.
Ultimately, human maturity is not a medal mechanically awarded just because one grows older or reaches a "developmental stage" carved up by scholars. The gaze that draws a line, saying, "I am an adult, so I am in a mature stage; you are a child, so you are in an immature stage," is the absolute pinnacle of true arrogance. Adults, too, are merely "immature humans" who constantly falter, stumble, and grow bit by bit until the final moment of their lives.
Beyond Theory: Simply Understanding the Person
Every human being is born immature. We cannot walk or eat on our own, and we easily crumble in the slightest breeze. And even when we age and become adults, a corner of our heart remains anxious and clumsy. This immaturity is simply the default state of human existence.
The very attempt to weigh this by dividing it into an "adult stage" and a "child stage" might be nothing more than the cowardly wordplay of those incapable of loving a human being as they are.
What matters is not pedantic developmental theory. It is my attitude toward the being in front of me who is a bit clumsier and more fragile than I am. There is no need to grandiosely praise a child’s universe, nor any need to sophisticatedly dress up their immaturity. Simply acknowledging their presence as they are—thinking, "You are right in the middle of growing up"—and holding them dear; that is the most fundamental respect we must recover in a world of adults blinded by arrogance.
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